Monday, August 1, 2011

Horoscopes for August 2011

written by Mystic Mascot

Ahhhh… the mists clear and the spirits enter. Will they be making your dreams come true? Have the stars finally aligned in your favour? Personally, I doubt it, but let’s have a look anyway…

Aries Mar 21 - Apr 20
It looks like dark times may be headed your way! Make sure you’ve paid your utility bills if you want to stop this from happening!
Lucky hobby: Stamp collecting

Taurus Apr 21 - May 21
A long trusted friend could betray you this month! But they probably won’t! Still, best start making new friends just in case!
Lucky hobby: Ham radio

Gemini May 22 - Jun 22
An innocent white lie you told last month will come back to haunt you this month! Hmmm… guess I should have told you about this last month! Sorry!
Lucky hobby: Scrapbooking

Cancer Jun 23 - Jul 23
Getting your own way will be a real challenge this month! Start plotting now or prepare for disappointment! The choice is yours!
Lucky hobby: Model building

Leo Jul 24 - Aug 23
It’s said that moving house is one of the most stressful things a person can do! So don’t move house if you want a stress free month! Simple!
Lucky hobby: Bird watching

Virgo Aug 24 - Sep 23
Avoid reading anything with the word “anthropologist” in it if you want to survive this month unscathed. Oh boy, I’ve done it again, haven’t I?
Lucky hobby: Metal detecting

Libra Sep 24 - Oct 23
A confusing horoscope prediction predicting a confusing horoscope prediction will leave you predictably confused this month!
Lucky hobby: Woodworking

Scorpio Oct 24 - Nov 22
Warning! Boredom may be headed your way! Practice nodding and smiling now to get through your friend’s holiday pics in one piece!
Lucky hobby: Candle making

Sagittarius Nov 23 - Dec 21
Saving money is indeed a good idea! Doing it by “borrowing” other peoples, however, is probably not the way to go! Remember this to avoid prison!
Lucky hobby: Fossil hunting

Capricorn Dec 22 - Jan 20
A month of fun and frivolity is headed your way! Although unfortunately it’s not stopping! Just passing through on the way to some other guy! Sorry!
Lucky hobby: Astronomy

Aquarius Jan 21 - Feb 19
The letters R, E, T, I, S, D, A, and S could spell disaster for you this month! Or any month, now that I think about it! Best avoid all of them!
Lucky hobby: Macramé

Pisces Feb 20 - Mar 20
Remember that thing you were thinking of doing this month? Well don’t do it! Do that other thing instead! Trust me on this one!
Lucky hobby: Train spotting

Ahhhh… the mists return and the spirits depart once more. And it looks like my instincts were correct! Oh well, there’s always next month! Until we meet again dear readers,
Mystic Mascot :)