Thursday, April 1, 2010

Horoscopes for April 2010

written by Mystic Mascot

Ahhhh… the mists clear and the spirits join us once again. But, with this being April Fools’ Day, one has to wonder what mood our psychic friends will be in. Will they bring fun and frivolity? Or will it be business as usual? Read on, if you dare…

Aries Mar 21 - Apr 20
A tough choice is headed your way this month, and making the right decision should be your top priority. If in doubt, try flipping a coin!
Lucky unit of measurement: The milligram

Taurus Apr 21 - May 21
Sleeping while working is not an example of multitasking! Remember this to avoid a future of financial uncertainty and worry!
Lucky unit of measurement: The furlong

Gemini May 22 - Jun 22
If you’ve been thinking about buying a new lawn mower lately, then now’s the time to do it. If you haven’t, then don’t!
Lucky unit of measurement: The megaton

Cancer Jun 23 - Jul 23
Cherry flavoured shoelaces are indeed a cheap and tasty treat. They are however no substitute for real shoelaces. Just letting you know!
Lucky unit of measurement: The square foot

Leo Jul 24 - Aug 23
Buying clothes to grow into is only ever a good idea for children. Heed this advice if you want to avoid looking like a fool! Ignore it if you’re trying to get that eighties look!
Lucky unit of measurement: The fathom

Virgo Aug 24 - Sep 23
An encounter with a wholesale onion salesman has the potential to leave you in tears. Although… that is kind of obvious!
Lucky unit of measurement: The ounce

Libra Sep 24 - Oct 23
It is often said that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. Unfortunately it is also the most common form of mockery! Remember this when making first impressions!
Lucky unit of measurement: The light year

Scorpio Oct 24 - Nov 22
Now’s the time to crack on with all those little jobs you’ve been putting off - so wave goodbye to your social life for the next four weeks! What? It’s not my fault you’re so lazy!
Lucky unit of measurement: The centimetre

Sagittarius Nov 23 - Dec 21
Trying to remember the name of an actor will drive you absolutely crazy this month, so here’s a clue to help: he was in that show with that girl, you know, the one with the car or something!
Lucky unit of measurement: The cubit

Capricorn Dec 22 - Jan 20
Honesty is the best policy if you want to get through this month with your dignity intact. And besides, we all know it wasn’t like that when you got there!
Lucky unit of measurement: The mile

Aquarius Jan 21 - Feb 19
You’re right, be yourself is good advice. Unfortunately however it is not always applicable. Remember this when attending that fancy dress party!
Lucky unit of measurement: The gallon

Pisces Feb 20 - Mar 20
Plagiarism is not the same thing as recycling. Take note of this to avoid unwanted embarrassment! Not to mention lawsuits!
Lucky unit of measurement: The acre

Ahhhh… the mists return and the spirits depart once more. Looks like it was business as usual, as usual! Until we meet again,
Mystic Mascot :)

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